To Infinity. . .

If you've seen Toy Story or Toy Story 2, you'll understand the reference of "To inifinity. . . and beyond!" Well, Here is Jackie's take on that.

A Great Big Thank You!

A HUGE thank you to all who responded in one way or another to my post on Thrush. I now have a few more options to try. Currently, I'm on another round of Fluconazole (generic for Diflucan) for seven days. I'm looking forward to that. Also, the best suggestion someone gave me that I hadn't tried or heard of was chamomile tea. You seep three chamomile tea bags in one cup of water for 20 minutes and then put that on your nipples. It does seem to help them feel better and heal. If Ben ever gets it back and gets another rash, I'm putting it on his bum, too. Another good thing I learned was to go to www.breastfeedingonline.com for any breastfeeding questions. There is a hotline in Greenville, SC for the lactation consultants there, but I'm not sure they want their number posted on the internet. If you need that info, feel free to contact me for it. Again, THANK YOU TO ALL!!!! YIPPEE!

10 Tips for flying with small children

Since my parents live on the other side of the country, and I really enjoy seeing my family, I have traveled with small children many many times. Traveling with an infant is different than traveling with a 3 year old. I am learning to revisit my ideas of traveling. However, here are some tips that I have learned the hard way.

1) If you have a baby, have something for them to suck on when the plane is taking off and landing. For me, it's just easiest to start nursing as soon as the plane starts taxiing. Then, it's common for my baby to fall asleep 15 minutes or so into the flight. Also, it helps the baby's ears to equalize, so they don't hurt.

2) Take a foldable stroller. You can check a stroller or carseat or a travel system (where the carseat clips onto the stroller) plane side. When going through security, the stroller gives you a place to put the child while you load everything else onto the conveyor belt. Then, take the child out and put the stroller/carseat on last. Pick it up as soon as it goes through, put it back together and strap the child in again while you put your laptop back in its bag etc.

3) Check the airport for suggestions on how early to arrive. With children, plan on 15 more minutes. It takes me 15 more minutes to get through security with children than when I'm by myself. If you have more time waiting for your flight, you can wander around the airport and get some wiggles out before the plane takes off.

4) If your baby is bigger than his age, take a copy of his/her birth certificate with you. This is not always required, but if your baby is 18 months old and looks like he's 2 1/2, you'll be sure not to run into any trouble.

5) Limit the carry-ons. With small children, you have your hands full enough. I like to combine my carry-on bag with the diaper bag. Also, I let Jackie carry her own small backpack with her toys and books in it.

6) If you have a full carseat and not just an infant carrier, check it as luggage. If they lose it, the airline must lend you another one. Also, take it from my experiences, carrying a carseat through the airport is unwieldly, heavy, and just plain miserable.

7) Take empty sippy cups and bottles. Fill them up in the airport. Also, most flights have a beverage service. You can get water or juice and fill up the sippy cups with that. It gets hairy trying to take sippy cups, liquid formula or that type of stuff on the planes now.

8) Take advantage of curbside check in. For $2-3 dollars per suitcase (depending on airport or airline), the sky cap will check your suitcases for you from the curb, and you don't have to haul all of your suitcases into the airport. Renting a luggage cart can cost $3.50 anyway, and you often still have to take your stuff over to the x-ray machine even after you're checked in inside. Dropping off all luggage at the curb gives you more chance to help your children inside and help them enjoy the airport instead of giving all your attention to a suitcase.

9) If you're parking your own car at the airport, look around for places you can park just off from the airport and then take the shuttle. It's usually much cheaper. For example, airport parking in Atlanta can cost $15 dollars a day for long term parking depending on which parking lot you choose. Whereas, there are places that have a shuttle service from an off airport lot where you can park for $10 a day and ride the shuttle. Then, the driver drops you right off at the curb. With the curbside shuttle service and the sky cap, you can minimalize your luggage handling.

10) Take early morning or late night flights. Sleeping children are easier than busy children. When we flew home from Utah, we purposely got an afternoon flight thinking that it would be easier to fly at that time when it was more convenient to get to the airport and our kids would be happy. All other flights I've taken with my kids have been late night flights and early morning flights. They're much easier because the kids are tired and the airplane ride helps them hold still. Then, they sleep.

Money Money Money

Money is a necessity in this world. When we need anything, it costs money. In fact, almost everything costs money. Strangely enough, even learning how to fix money problems can cost money. When people are scraping pennies to feed their families and pay rent plus minimum payments on their debts, they can sometimes cringe when it comes to paying even more money to try to get out of debt. If you're not absolutely certain that the program will work, why would they pay their precious money to get out of debt.



When we're in debt and stressed about money, we become more attached to our needs and less attached to our kids. As an attachment parent, I don't want my money problems getting in the way of my attachment to my kids. We can become a slave to debt. Instead, (no matter how much or little money we make) we can live within a budget, get out of debt, and start paying more attention to our kids than our money again.



Here is a treasure chest full of good money saving tips and finance helps on a free blog posted by a fellow attachment parent. http://crisanja-livelikenooneelse.blogspot.com/

ECing and the media

There have been some ECing articles in the news this week. I subscribe to ivillage.com because they often have some good ideas on parenting. My inbox came up with "Diaper Free Baby" from ivillage, and I clicked on it. Here is the link: http://slideshow.ivillage.com/parenting/pregnancy/calendar/your_babys_development/diaperfree_babies/?nlcid=pb09-17-2007 I thought that the description was fair, but the comments about it were harsh. Here is the article that is attched to it from MSNBC. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20464264/ Although I am not a diaper-free mom, I am definately a part-time ECing mom. Ben even pooped and peed in the potty this morning. With Jackie, I caught all but six or seven poops since she was a year old. She would hiss when she needed to go potty. Even at my mom-in-law's house, she started hissing, and fussing, and my mom-in-law kept checking her diaper. She wouldn't poop in her diaper. When I got back from my meeting, Jackie came up to my hissing, so I took her. My mom-in-law was shocked. I bought her a little potty that day, and she used it. Babies cannot be able to "hold it" for a long time because their muscles aren't strong enough, but they are able to know the sensation and purposely cue the parent. That is being potty trained. What is the difference between "SSSSS" and "Mommy I need to potty."? I feel that there is no difference. The child is aware of the sensation and purposely communicate a need.

The difference between Elimination commucation and traditional potty training is the attitude. Im am not potty training my babies. I'm helping them be more aware of their bodies, and I am helping them learn to communicate their needs with me. I love ECing, and I'm glad.

A Day at the park

Today has been a good day so far. We ate lunch at the park with my friend and her daughter. It was lovely! There is a nice play area and lunch area that the methodist church here owns. They are so nice to share it with everyone! It has two big picnic tables and two child-sized picnic tables. It also has some really nice playground equipment that is nice even for Toddlers! It was so nice to sit in the shade at the picnic tables and watch the kids play. Ben just kept cruising around the bench of the picnic tables, and Jackie and Tolina played really well at the play area. It was fun.

Anything and Everything

I'm not doing great at keeping up my blog with only attachment parenting and ecing topics, so this may turn into just a general blog with comments on attachment parenting and elimination communication. Part of that may be that I am not doing a grandios job of ECing my little guy, but in the end, I already have to buy Tushies diapers (because of his sensative bottom) and I can't wash the cloth diapers every day! I'm not feeling great about my AP or ECing right now, but I'll get the hang of it again.

Good luck to all.

Air conditioning filters and power

So, today while the girl I hired was here helping me clean, my house got hot. I thought that it was just because we had both been cleaning. We did clean out the fridge. We took all the food off each shelf (if the food looked like it was becoming a science fair project, we tossed it), and took the shelves out, washed them in hot, soapy water, wiped down the fridge and put the food back. We did it with the freezer, too. We also got the living room cleaned up and the kitchen floor swept and mopped. All in all, it was success. However, understandably we felt hot. So, I took her home, and I went back home to cook dinner. I just kept getting hotter and hotter as time went by. Finally, I had dinner ready, and we ate tacos. By this time, I was feeling really hot, but I had been working all day, and then I was cooking on a hot stove. Oh well, so we ate dinner, and I was sweltering. We went to my friend's daughter's softball game tonight, and Jackie played on the playground by the ball fields. We were smelling smoke (A wild fire broke out within 15 miles of here), so we decided to go home. We got home, and I again thought, "The house is so hot!" Finally, I ended up looking at the thermostat, wonder of wonder, it read 80! It was set at 70.

We went to Wal-mart to find a filter, but they didn't have the right size, so we tried one that was the wrong size, and the air conditioner wouldn't turn on. Instead, we went out to the garage to look one more time for an air filter, and there was a stack of 4 right in the garage. Somedays, I'm such a dork!

ECing is good again

So, after the problems we had with my two year old, she seems to be completely recovered. I just worked harder at communicating with her. I tried to understand that she needed some more attention, and I tried to help her understand that I don't like to clean up her misses when she can put them in the potty every time. I told her that if she wanted, she could wear pull-ups, and when she wanted to go potty she could. If she wanted me to change her pull-ups, I would, but she had to ask. I told her that whatever she wanted to do it was her choice, but I wasn't going to clean up messes anymore. Right after that, she took off her pull-ups and decided that she wanted to pee on the floor, so I gave her big towel and told her how to clean it up. She went into the bathroom to do it on the floor just to see if I was serious. After I gave her the towel to clean it up, she felt like she could be in charge of herself. It gave up the power struggle. She wore pull ups for two or three days. She even tried to poop in pull ups. I asked her if she was pooping and she said, "Yes." I said, don't you want to poop on the potty? You don't usually like poop on your bottom. She listened and went right to the potty. She really didn't like to mess herself. She really liked to be clean, and she realized that trying to get attention that way wasn't worth it. During all of this, I really worked to give her a lot of positive attention when she decided to do positive things. Also, I held her through her timeouts, so she could see the difference between positive and negative attention. Since that time, she has started saying, "Mommy (or Daddy) I need some attention." And I will put down whatever I'm doing and go read her a book or sing songs with her. It has really helped us to communicate better, and she has been much happier with less tantrums.

Also, I have been better about ECing my son again lately. I put him back in Pampers (TM) disposable diapers, and he is allergic to them in some way. I think that those diapers make the yeast infection come back. :(. So He is in cloth diapers today, and I'm going to try to EC him as much as possible. Fewer diapers to wash! :) Good luck to me!

Mother's Day

I've had a great Mother's Day today. I got a Cuddlebug *TM (i.e. a die cutting and embossing machine), and it's pretty fun. I have wonderful children, and they have been a joy today. My daughter is having a hard time wanting to go to bed, so it will be awhile before we go to bed, but things are good on Mother's Day.

The crazy world of cleaning house

Anyone who knows me will agree with me when I say that I am notoriously disorganized. Amazingly enough, I can be that disorganized and still get oodles done every day. However, with the disorganization comes a horribly messy house. I don't like a "dirty" house, but it's hard to keep the underneath clean when the mess covers everything. I got so sick of my house that I have hired a girl to come help me four hours a week.

I have discovered a breakthrough in homemaking. It's called www.flylady.net. She gives tips on how to keep your house clean! And they work!!! You would not believe it. Just follow the system for a week and see if your house is not cleaner.

You say, "How does this help me be a better parent?" Well, it helps me. Being a young mother with a two year old and an infant, I feel like I have to watch my children like a hawk, making sure that they aren't becoming the vacuum cleaner because I didn't get the floor cleaned up to use the electronic vacuum. Things are definately looking up. We have eaten at home for all our meals this week except for Tuesday at lunch (and that was planned to be out.) Our family went out almost every day last month. Our budget was feeling it. It scares me though, to eat something I've cooked in a dirty kitchen. Therefore, when my kitchen was in its old state, I could not cook at home. THANK YOU flylady!!!

Not really an attachment parent?

So, all along for my daughter's almost three years of her life and my son's seven months (today), I have thought of myself as an attachment parent. However, according to an Attachment Parent International (API for short) news letter, I have come to discover that I'm not. I don't do tantrums. I can't stand them. My personal idea on tantrums is that every person has the right and reason to cry. Babies cry all the time, and we listen because they can't communicate. However, I feel that it is important to help children use their words and find other ways of communicating instead of tantrums. It is not acceptable behavior for an adult to have a tantrum. When do we learn that tantrums aren't acceptable? We learn that hitting and biting aren't acceptable behaviors from a young age. When do we learn about tantrums? I feel like tantrums should be learned right along with other things.

I do however feel like it's OK to cry or be angry. We just have to find the right ways of behaving when we're sad or angry. If my kids want to cry and throw fits, that's fine with me. They just can't ruin things for the rest of everyone. They are welcome to throw a fit. However, they have to do it in their rooms. When my two year old starts throwing a fit, I tell her, "You're welcome to throw a fit. Just go to your room and do it." Now, sometimes when she wants to cry, she goes to her room first and then starts to cry and throw a fit. The Attachment Parenting letter that went out stated that children can't reason when they're angry. If we don't teach them to reason when they're angry, when do they learn it? We have to learn to reason when we're angry before we kill someone or truly hurt someone.

Therefore, although I agree with SO many (Almost all) of the API ideals of parenting. I'm not truly, completely, an Attachment Parent. I just can't sit and watch Jackie throw a fit and then be sympathetic to it later.

Introduction to attachment parenting blog

This is my blog about attachment parenting. Attachment parenting is a certain style of parenting where the parent and child become attached to one another. It is a child led parenting style. The idea is that children are born with needs and that in meeting those needs the parents and children become attached. One of those needs is to be held, so baby wearing is part of attachment parenting. Attachment parenting is a form of parenting that when a baby cries it is because the baby needs something. You cannot spoil a baby. Therefore, holding a child who is crying is a necessity instead of a way to spoil children. Attachment parents rarely, if ever, subscribe to the "cry it out" method. We work to find the root of a problem and solve it instead of just working to pacify a child. In the end, attachment parenting is a way for parents to have a guide in helping their children become more independent.